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what's the worst hook up experience you've ever had?
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CFL



Joined: 14 Sep 2002
Posts: 147
Location: BC, Canada
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This thread is truly just a glorious moment in Non-Prophet's Forum history.

Funny shit.

I'm just waiting for a religious argument to break out.
Post Tue Aug 26, 2003 9:31 pm
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The RIAA TookMyMusicAway



Joined: 23 Apr 2003
Posts: 647
Location: San Francisco, CA
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craig wrote:
i really don't have a horrible story.

but ladies, stay away from handjobs.

i've never met a girl who can give one, yet they all try.

leave the art with the artists.
that means guys give the best handjobs. a hypothesis i'm not willing to research.
Post Wed Aug 27, 2003 12:26 am
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August Spies



Joined: 09 Aug 2002
Posts: 1979
Location: D.C.
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てつお wrote:
craig wrote:
i really don't have a horrible story.

but ladies, stay away from handjobs.

i've never met a girl who can give one, yet they all try.

leave the art with the artists.
that means guys give the best handjobs. a hypothesis i'm not willing to research.


He meant masturbation doofus.
Post Wed Aug 27, 2003 12:29 am
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maxamillion



Joined: 05 Sep 2002
Posts: 1040
Location: The Netherlands
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craig wrote:
i really don't have a horrible story.

but ladies, stay away from handjobs.

i've never met a girl who can give one, yet they all try.

leave the art with the artists.




WOOOOOOOOOOORD UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now your talking....also tell them about how tired we are of always having to do all the work.

"I'm from a planet called bitch please, and that shit is a dissease(??)"
Post Wed Aug 27, 2003 2:35 am
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bensandoval



Joined: 12 May 2003
Posts: 2564
Location: berkeley
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i don't have any funny or even embarassing hook up stories.

princess, sorry to hear about your recent problems. heads dropped you some great advice.

straight up though, as much as you may love him, you HAVE to put yourself first. i'm going through similar shit so i know how you feel. you're young and you have a long time to get over him. as ridiculously difficult as this sounds, it'll happen. slowly but surely.

good luck

-ben
Post Wed Aug 27, 2003 4:18 am
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barlow



Joined: 30 Jun 2002
Posts: 1100
Location: Leeds, UK
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I snapped my banjo string whilst in action one night.
Bled like a bastard.
It has healed back, but in a fucked up way, and now I think I need to get circumcised.
The only thing that has stopped me going is that I don't want to tell my mother that I am going into hospital to get the end of my dick cut off.
Might not matter soon anyway. If I get married, I probably wont be using it anymore anyway.


I got a friend who is a nurse in a hospital, and he told me that the best excuse he ever heard from anyone was when a woman came in to accident and emergency one night with an orange stuck somewhere that oranges shouldnt be put.
They all managed not to even smirk, until she told them "I was getting out of the shower when I slipped and landed on the fruit bowl"
Post Wed Aug 27, 2003 6:45 am
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Clark Nova



Joined: 03 Feb 2003
Posts: 118
Location: Arcturus
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maxamillion wrote:
craig wrote:
i really don't have a horrible story.

but ladies, stay away from handjobs.

i've never met a girl who can give one, yet they all try.

leave the art with the artists.




WOOOOOOOOOOORD UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now your talking....also tell them about how tired we are of always having to do all the work.

"I'm from a planet called bitch please, and that shit is a dissease(??)"


I no longer find this to be true. My girls got it down. The lube, the pressure, the speed, the twists and turns. I was amazed. I can't wait to get home. Keep hope alive.
Post Wed Aug 27, 2003 8:08 am
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invisiblemcs



Joined: 06 Nov 2002
Posts: 889
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some girls have too much grip. like they are playing tug of war with that shit
Post Wed Aug 27, 2003 4:02 pm
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vintge
is vintge vince? vince vintge vincge?


Joined: 17 Jul 2002
Posts: 4333
Location: LA
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careful dood you might get whooping cough from the girls hand.

ive heard you could get cataracts from her just looking at your peni
Post Wed Aug 27, 2003 5:12 pm
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Bobby Anticon
Guest




laugh laugh laugh and repeat.  Reply with quote  

maxamillion wrote:
craig wrote:
i really don't have a horrible story.

but ladies, stay away from handjobs.

i've never met a girl who can give one, yet they all try.

leave the art with the artists.




WOOOOOOOOOOORD UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now your talking....also tell them about how tired we are of always having to do all the work.



yeah well this goes without saying right? why go hand when the mouth tastes so much better my friend. Actully the worst happend by accident...kind of felt bad but I let it happen...and i knew it was going to happen...but i couldn't turn away. I made out witha fat chick...end of story. and the handjob...damn she pretty much did damage to it...if i wouldn't of told her to let loose...damn she was pulling out roots man...ROOTS!....damn H-jobs are simple iam thinking...just me talking.
"I'm from a planet called bitch please, and that shit is a dissease(??)"
Post Wed Aug 27, 2003 11:38 pm
 

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