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what's the worst hook up experience you've ever had?
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triptik



Joined: 25 Oct 2002
Posts: 161
Location: Balmer, Merlin
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that's definitely one of the best stories yet!
what do you look like paige?


here is one that my bro told me about his friend J (name hidden to protect the inocent): picture her as a little petite blond girl. she and her man of one year or so are having sex in her dorm room and to make it more interesting (apparently they are in missionary) she opens her eyes and mouth really big at the same time she yells "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGG"

the boy jumps out of the bed and runs to the bathroom and locks himself in. he swears he won't come out till her demon is gone and that she must promise she will never do it again. according to J he was really really scared and almost pissed himself.

i dunno, i think it's kinda funny.
Post Tue Mar 18, 2003 4:17 pm
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eggplant xanadu
try-harderator


Joined: 10 Oct 2002
Posts: 2946
Location: Boston
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Oh My Word Paige.
Post Tue Mar 18, 2003 4:23 pm
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eggplant xanadu
try-harderator


Joined: 10 Oct 2002
Posts: 2946
Location: Boston
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triptik wrote:

here is one that my bro told me about his friend J (name hidden to protect the inocent): picture her as a little petite blond girl. she and her man of one year or so are having sex in her dorm room and to make it more interesting (apparently they are in missionary) she opens her eyes and mouth really big at the same time she yells "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGG"

the boy jumps out of the bed and runs to the bathroom and locks himself in. he swears he won't come out till her demon is gone and that she must promise she will never do it again. according to J he was really really scared and almost pissed himself.

i dunno, i think it's kinda funny.


fucking classic
Post Tue Mar 18, 2003 4:25 pm
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Bjorn



Joined: 19 Mar 2003
Posts: 1
Location: California
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"as I said in Message Sent, I have never even asked for a kiss. I can't manage to get things like that out of my mouth. i figure if a girl WANTS to kiss me she will. If a girl doesn't WANT to do anything, then it shouldn't even be asked for. That's just...shitty. but...hey. to each his own."

And not every girl will tell you she wants you first. If all girls had the same mindset as you, you would never get kissed. Luckily for you some dont =)
(wasn't it "I never asked for a kiss without deserving one" ?)
Post Wed Mar 19, 2003 8:00 am
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Sage Francis
Self Fighteous


Joined: 30 Jun 2002
Posts: 21596
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you are right.

I am wrong.

I have never asked for a first kiss. I take them as they come.

once the kissing has been initiated I will ask for more.

And you don't have to ask for them to get them. They just happen. Its best that way.
Post Wed Mar 19, 2003 10:20 am
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Nope



Joined: 23 Jan 2003
Posts: 1916
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Sage Francis wrote:

And you don't have to ask for them to get them. They just happen. Its best that way.
Post Wed Mar 19, 2003 12:19 pm
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PHIL LACIO AKA P DAWG
the godfather of troll


Joined: 18 Oct 2002
Posts: 4825
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RandomSurge wrote:
Sage Francis wrote:

And you don't have to ask for them to get them. They just happen. Its best that way.




its best to grab the gal by the back of the neck and ram your tongue down her throat.that will go in two directions
- a punch to the jaw
- brains and fornication
Post Wed Mar 19, 2003 12:22 pm
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PaigeMaster6



Joined: 01 Jul 2002
Posts: 628
Location: asheville, NC and NYC
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shaner...haha. you kill me. i fuckin love you.

as for the story...i laugh about this shit all the time. i think it's hillarious. at the time it wasn't too funny, but now...it really is.

what do i look like?? that's interesting. how can you really describe that? i'm 5'2, crazy blond hair, blue eyes with a southern accent. yeah...

i agree with what sage said above. well said.
Post Wed Mar 19, 2003 12:29 pm
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Billy Gnosis



Joined: 16 Jul 2003
Posts: 1281
Location: Southern Oregon
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Sage Francis wrote:

I have never asked for a first kiss. I take them as they come.

once the kissing has been initiated I will ask for more.

And you don't have to ask for them to get them. They just happen. Its best that way.


werd. I enjoy being a male human, every now and again. If you're asking for a kiss you look sex-starved, chances are you'll prejaculate too.
Post Mon Aug 25, 2003 6:35 pm
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duke_city



Joined: 05 Jul 2002
Posts: 3208
Location: San Diego,CA
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DownsizedTRUTH wrote:
My story of an awkward sexual moment took place during my first year of college. I was a wide eyed freshman with big dreams and aspirations, one of which was to get some ass. So one night after a solid couple rounds of king's cup in the dorms, I decide to make my dreams a reality. I stroll on down to the second floor, where i knew of a girl who seemed interested in what i had to offer. The two weeks leading up to this night had held many a flirtatious encounter between this anonymous vixen and myself. So i arrive at her door, and give a little knock. She lets me in and the preliminary games begin. There is kissing, groping, and dry humping all occurring in a chaotic little ritual called the "drunken college shuffle". So i say at least a half hour goes by while we are both engaged in this suppossed foreplay. So we reach a lul in our activites, and i am startin to feel a little loose with my words, and I figure its time to take it up a notch. This is when it goes all wrong my friends, and I quote, "So how about some head?". THIS IS ALL THE GAME I HAVE! THAT'S IT, THAT IS THE BEST I CAN FUCKIN DO. Well this girl gives me a face like i just bitch slapped her grandmother at easter mass. "JESUS CHRIST. I AM NOT A SLUT! FUCK YOU!" That was the segway from the bed to being tossed out of the room with a loud slamming of the door as to really drive home how much of an ass I am. So I dusted myself off, reflected on the situation with a few more brews, and passed out, ALONE and with some serious blue balls. Honestly looking back I can't believe i even thought that was gonna work, but at the time it seemed like stroke of genius. Anyway, that is it, that is my sexual mishap, or rather verbal fuck up.


Its a shame DownsizedTRUTH doesn't post much on here his story is hillarious.

Brian
Post Mon Aug 25, 2003 6:50 pm
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Doctrine



Joined: 05 Apr 2003
Posts: 4626
Location: ATL, Livin' Swell
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My roomate had sex with some girl in high school and after she left from the sex he saw she had crapped all in his bed during sex...He never found out if she knew she had done it or not...But he told me everytime he saw her in school he would give her a glare...
Post Mon Aug 25, 2003 7:14 pm
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Billy Gnosis



Joined: 16 Jul 2003
Posts: 1281
Location: Southern Oregon
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"All any woman ever really wants is some serious deep dickin'."

Say that next time, please.
Post Mon Aug 25, 2003 7:21 pm
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FoJaR



Joined: 06 Feb 2003
Posts: 1534
Location: VA.
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Doctrine wrote:
My roomate had sex with some girl in high school and after she left from the sex he saw she had crapped all in his bed during sex...He never found out if she knew she had done it or not...But he told me everytime he saw her in school he would give her a glare...


what theeeeeeee????
Post Mon Aug 25, 2003 7:26 pm
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Vegas Kid



Joined: 24 Aug 2003
Posts: 8
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada
making bread  Reply with quote  

A friend of mine hooked up with my girlfriend's cousin. who was sort of a slut. but anyways, he hooks up with this girl and goes down on her. a couple of days later his throat starts hurting, so he goes to his doctor cuz his throat is like grey lookin. so the doctor takes a look at it... my friend had a yeast infection in his throat. no joke
Post Mon Aug 25, 2003 9:39 pm
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Craig a.d.



Joined: 12 Mar 2003
Posts: 2141
Location: America's High-Five
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that made me gag

gag em E, dam tah T!
Post Mon Aug 25, 2003 9:48 pm
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