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breakup thread. is it in the air?
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Lants



Joined: 07 Aug 2006
Posts: 2234
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oh yeah, my advice is DON'T do the friends thing. it's BS. can't work.
start walking and do not look back.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 8:51 am
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Mikal kHill



Joined: 29 Jun 2002
Posts: 6852
Location: http://mikalkhill.com
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My ex is still one of my best friends. Maybe my very best friend that is not my wife.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 8:57 am
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X the Outsider



Joined: 17 Apr 2005
Posts: 1070
Location: Iowa
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It can work, it all depends on the situation. I say a good time away from each other at first and then see what happens after everyone has healed and moved on.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 9:01 am
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zeem



Joined: 29 Apr 2003
Posts: 3885
Location: elsewhere
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ya, the biggest saving grace of this breakup has been the fact that her and I are way more honest and loving towards each other now. Perhaps that will change, but right now it feels good to have her as a friend.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 9:02 am
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Nahgied



Joined: 30 Mar 2004
Posts: 376
Location: Ontario
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the trick is not sleeping/wanting to sleep with each other.

hense why time apart usually helps.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 9:10 am
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mancabbage



Joined: 29 Jun 2005
Posts: 9263
Location: london
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buy a dog, just don't fuck it cos that ain't cool
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 9:40 am
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Limbs



Joined: 04 Feb 2011
Posts: 910
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You should totally try to grab one more roll in the hay. Worked out all 7 times for me.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 11:15 am
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T-Wrex
p00ny tang


Joined: 30 Jun 2002
Posts: 6405
Location: Detroit, Michigan
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You've been divorced 7 times?

Who are you.. Larry King?
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:31 pm
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Neuro
A champion of Kurtis SP


Joined: 19 Jul 2002
Posts: 7799
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Lants wrote:
oh yeah, my advice is DON'T do the friends thing. it's BS. can't work.
start walking and do not look back.



i dont like this train of thought, unless the other person is just plain awful
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:48 pm
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tommi teardrop



Joined: 12 Apr 2007
Posts: 2216
Location: Las Vegas
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Exes that remain friends and get along well post breakup are the exception to the rule. Generally one person cares more than the other and gets hurt. If years have passed, that's one thing, but to keep a recent ex around is a sure fire way to stall the moving on process. You might even end up hating the ex.

Cut ties, remain civil. Think of all the free time you will have for hobbies. In a year or two, you'll meet someone that makes you question how much really cared about the ex in the first place.

That's life. It's hard as shit though. But you will be a much better partner the next time around.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 5:13 pm
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doogs



Joined: 15 Jul 2003
Posts: 410
Location: Verbier, Switzerland
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I got broked up on.. and im fuct up.
(and i want a dog..but my life is screwed right now.. cant screw the pooches life aswell.)

so... i made this mix.

http://soundcloud.com/gitgo/return-to-sender
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 6:06 pm
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Dream Inspired



Joined: 09 Jun 2006
Posts: 2121
Location: genoa
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you guys are crazy if you think the friends thing really works. it's been my experience that one of the two people involved usually feels more for the other than the other feels for them and someone always ends up getting hurt. i've been on both ends of it more than once... shit, more than twice even...

you can't read the other person's mind or heart and there is no way that you can guarantee that they aren't still secretly in love with you.

walk and keep on walking or tread very carefully.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 6:32 pm
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zeem



Joined: 29 Apr 2003
Posts: 3885
Location: elsewhere
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I guess there's an exception here. It's been great.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 7:15 pm
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metacognition



Joined: 22 Feb 2006
Posts: 95
Location: A place called Earth.
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Holy shit, it's been 2.5 years since I've had any communication with my ex. We were together for 5.5 years and had a pretty nasty breakup (which coincided with my parents' nasty divorce--compounding my depression and pain). At the beginning of our separation, I was in complete disarray and my attempt at still keeping the communication line open was shot down. Since then, I have still been in complete disarray...but, I am actually happy to say that the intense cravings of wanting any kind of contact or reunion with her have waned. Still, there are moments in every single fucking day of mine that have me thinking about her and all the fun/love/stress/hate we made, and me wishing we could still correspond with one another. Then I start thinking about her new relationship...and how I feel I still can't get involved in a new relationship because I'm still hung up...and thinking that there's something wrong with me that needs to be fixed because I haven't "moved on." With that said, I do feel I am healing but not completely healed yet. Hell, who knows if I'll ever be completely healed? Perhaps it doesn't exist...and maybe I'm just a sentimental piece of shit who's learning to never turn back.

So, if we never contact each other again or if we finally speak to each other and reestablish friendly relations, I must still continue to look forward to the dot-dot-dot (...) and just fucking hope for the best for myself and those I still love.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 7:48 pm
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mortalthoughts
LAME KID


Joined: 12 Dec 2002
Posts: 11616
Location: MI
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Lants wrote:
oh yeah, my advice is DON'T do the friends thing. it's BS. can't work.
start walking and do not look back.


im really torn, i REALLY care about her and her daughter and at this point i feel that if i cut off all contact with her i would be doing her kid an injustice, im the only male figure in the kids life besides her imidate family (not her father)
her daughter is 2 and a half years old and gets so excited to see me
its weird . i dont know how to deal with just being friends with her while being totally attached to her kid.
Post Thu Jun 09, 2011 9:01 pm
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